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We Use the Good China

1/25/2016

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My grandmother died a long time ago. A really long time ago. I was blessed with inheriting her beautiful china set. Its a full set and includes dessert dishes and teacups. It is in pink and yellow, and trimmed in gold. I love the idea of my aunts and uncles and all of our extended family having used these beautiful dishes over the years. It makes me feel connected to my grandparents and others who have passed. Family china. It means so much to me. And happens to be in exactly my taste, which is a nice bonus. 
When my grandmother died, I was too young to be hosting any dinners, and until fairly recently, I wasn't much of a cook. The china was packed and stored in my basement in various apartments until I bought my house. "OK. Now I get to use the china!" 
Except I didn't. We kept the good silverware, china, and special glasses put away for just the right occasion. For the fifteen years that I lived in that house, I never used it once. 
Peter came in to my life at the end of my divorce. I was sorting out my house, and I had a big job of downsizing from a four bedroom house to a two bedroom loft. He helped me go through everything and helped me with some difficult decisions about what to keep. So, one night, going through boxes, we came across the china. After ten minutes of me rambling on about how much I loved it and what it meant to me, Peter said, "lets use this tonight for dinner." 
It was like being set free! Out came the crystal glasses, the amazing silverware. A hand-painted water pitcher and glasses from Italy. Flowers and candles on the table. I don't remember what we ate that night, but I remember sitting there thinking, "all of these years. These exquisite things sat in boxes in the dark. " 
We pledged there and then that we would use all of the beautiful things, all of the time. Every day. We make a simple meal beautiful. We don't have to wait for a special Veuve Cliquot night to use the good champagne glasses. Korbel Brut Rose tastes just lovely out of the same glass. We don't wait for lobster or caviar to use the dishes. A nice veggie stir-fry looks and tastes fantastic with the dishes and silver. 
The day that my mother told us that all of these things could go in the dishwasher was like icing on the cake! And you know what, if something breaks, so what. At least it will have been used and loved. And not wrapped in a box in the dark.  
So wear that special dress, carry that special handbag. Even if its just to the movies. Or make an occasion, go to the Giacomo , and order a special glass of wine and look at the spectacular view of the falls. Or take those special plates and a lovely tablecloth and have a beautiful dessert picnic at the park by the water. 
We dont know how many years that we have on this earth,but I can assure you, we will spend them making each day as special as possible. We use the good china. 

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Oh, this is why that happened? Why did this happen again? I am not quite sure why this happened.

1/24/2016

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Every once in a while, I feel sorry for myself. My marriage didn't work out, I went from a house to an apartment, I had to figure some stuff out. Blah blah blah. 
Now, OK. Sometimes I am disappointed about the past. At the same time, I am in a place close to the water. Where I have always wanted to be. With someone who genuinely loves me. And loves me well. A brilliant, complicated, hilarious man. Who loves talking and listening. And being with me. I have a beautiful and amazing dog. I am making plans for all kinds of stuff that I had given up any hope for. And there is a lot of stuff!! Wait til you hear all of it! 
My life is so different now. In the summer, we walk to the water and hear music. In the winter, we take the pup to the dog park and then maybe walk around town, hear music, visit with our friends. Our apartment is in bright blissful color.We host brunches, dinner parties, cocktail parties.  He welcomes not only my family and friends, but embraces people from my past who most people would forbid or eyeroll/reject. 
Everything, and I mean: everything, in the world is possible now. Everything. 
So, Universe, I don't know why you had to put me through all that, because it was fantastic, then it was excruciating, then I moved on. But OK. As Hannah Marcotti would say, #ilovethislifenow. 


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Have to Believe We are Magic

1/22/2016

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We don't really have an anniversary. Our relationship started out kind of unconventionally. Peter made a comment on my friend Rebecca's Facebook page. I told him that I thought that he was clever and funny. Shortly thereafter, he sent me a friend request with the disclaimer, " you seem lovely. I hope that doesn't seem too fruity." 
Once we were Facebook friends, we started messaging back and forth. I thought he was smart and funny. And he is. I was in the middle of the aftermath of getting divorced and I wasn't sleeping much. My conversations with him became highlights of my day. He really is a fascinating man, and he loved listening as much as he loved talking. These late night talks got me through my first single Holidays, and many nights of confusion and loneliness.
Eventually, we started talking on the phone. Some nights he would talk to me for hours until I could fall asleep. His voice. It was kind, masculine, beautiful and calming to me. 
I was dating pretty much anybody who would ask me at that time. I thought that no one would ever want me again and I was absolutely shocked to see that lots and lots of people were interested in me romantically. Broken-hearted from a divorce that I never expected, I realized that I didn't know how to "pick out" a person to be in my life. So I took a deep breath and trusted the Universe to bring me a companion if I was meant to have one. 
Months passed, and Peter and I finally had our first date. It didn't go all that well. Strong and sure on the phone, Peter was soft spoken and shy in person. I told all of my friends that I wasn't planning on ever seeing him again. But I missed Phone Peter. Badly. 
Date number two, he must have had a hell of a peptalk with himself on the way to town, because he was so overly aggressive and overblown that I found him insufferable. He left, I vowed that I would never see him again. But, you guessed it, I missed Phone Peter. 
Date number three, the real Peter Kelleher came to town. Brilliant, interesting, sexy, fun Peter. It took us both a while to realize  that we were pretty much in love before the day that we met. But we got there. And we have been together ever since. We just cant really figure out an anniversary per se. We have decided that the first day of spring will be our special day. 
Oh, and we needed a song. Peter jokingly suggested Photograph by Def Leppard, because I love Def Leppard and all he had was a photograph for the three months that we talked before we met. So that was funny and cute and all, but that was not "our song." 
We came in last night to hear Olivia Newton John's,  Magic playing. I said, "could this be our song?" And he said, " I thought this already was our song."


Come take my hand
You should know me
I've always been in your mind
You know that I'll be kind
I'll be guiding you

Building your dream
Has to start now
There's no other road to take
You won't make a mistake
I'll be guiding you

You have to believe we are magic
Nothin' can stand in our way
You have to believe we are magic
Don't let your aim ever stray
And if all your hopes survive
Your destiny will arrive
I'll bring all your dreams alive
For you

From where I stand
You are home free
The planets align so rare
There's promise in the air
And I'm guiding you

Through every turn I'll be near you
I'll come anytime you call
I'll catch you when you fall
I'll be guiding you

You have to believe we are magic
Nothin' can stand in our way
You have to believe we are magic
Don't let your aim ever stray
And if all your hopes survive
Your destiny will arrive
I'll bring all your dreams alive
For you
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I Fell in Love With a Girl

1/20/2016

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Her name is KD Puppy. She is a black lab/bluetick coonhound mix, at least that is the SPCA's best guess. 

I have wanted a dog for all of my adult life. I lived by myself for many years, with a work schedule that would leave a poor pup home alone too much. When I was married, my ex husband was not in favor of a dog, and I feel like you need two yes votes to bring a dog in to your home. 

When Peter and I first got together I told him that I had always wanted a dog.  He kind of brushed it off, like maybe down the road at some point. He wasn't saying no, just not just yet. We enjoy our little adventures and wanted some time to just be "us," before bringing a dog in to our world. Finally, this past September we decided it was time to start looking. Or rather, I decided and he went along with the idea. *giggle-giggle*

The plan was that I would start visiting the SPCA, and when I found a dog that I liked I would have him come and make sure that they were a good match as well. Our plan was a 1-3 year old dog that was trained at least a bit. We did not limit ourselves to a particular breed. We felt that our dog would find us. Peter has an affinity for German Shepherds, and I have always been crazy-fond of Dalmatians. Still, we, said, our dog can be a Chihuahua or a Great Dane, or a Beagle, or a mutt. 

I went to visit the SPCA a handful of times. I walked some beautiful dogs, but none of them felt like a fit. One day, I walked a very sweet pitbull mix. She was a little tough on the leash, but otherwise well behaved around other dogs and humans. I came back to walk her a second time, and she was awful. Im sure that she could be a lovely dog with some serious training, but I have no backround in dog training and both of us work full time. Nope. She was not our dog. Sadly, I went over to pet a little puppy just to cheer myself up. The puppy was friendly and affectionate and sweet. She had my heart the moment that I saw her. She had these eyes that looked right in to me while she jumped up to give me as many kisses as I could handle. "Oh, " said a woman watching me. "That's your dog." 


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I texted Peter to ask what he thought about the idea of a puppy. Of course, I enticingly included a picture of the adorable little peanut. He said, "could be cool," so I put her on hold so he could meet her. When the time came, she ran right up and licked his face, and he was also in love. "I've got cash on me, how do we make this happen," was all that he had to say. 


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If you ever decide to adopt a puppy, people will tell you that you are crazy. They chew things up, they need house training, they need a lot of exercise and play, even when the weather is horrible. All of this is true. But you know what, I don't mind taking her for walks, I love it. We keep a pretty close eye on her and divert her from chewing, but if she gets a glove or a sock, its not the end of the world. This dog has kissed away my tears when I have been inconsolable, snuggled with me and watched over me when I was sick. She sits happily at our feet while we read or watch tv. She has traveled with us beautifully. She gets me out seeing beauty on days when I would never have left the house for the cold. I have wanted a dog all of my adult life, but I never knew how deeply my heart would swell with love. 

KD Puppy is seven months old. We have had her for four months, and I cannot imagine my life without her. ​​
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Peter named our beautiful girl KD, after singer KD Lang. "Lady in a tux=KD."
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Writer, Blocked!

1/19/2016

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I am not going to address my two year hiatus from writing. Well, I will. But in little stories that come out here and there. I am not going to write a long "catch up," or update. It will be pretty clear from my writing that things have changed an awful lot in the last couple of years. A move. A love. A puppy. Lots of new friends. And lots and lots of adventures. I haven't been "sleeping at life" during my hiatus from writing. Rather, I have probably lived more adventures in these last two years than I have at any other point in my life. But I don't have to tell them all at once. 
The brilliant Peter Kelleher+me.                   Bridge at Canalfest photo by Richard Gleason              KD Puppy
The format of this blog is not going to change. Its going to be me writing about whatever I feel like writing about, whenever I feel like writing. I hope you will join me in jumping back in the water. I love to swim, and I hate to swim alone. 
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